I have in my possession at this moment an elixir. An elixir of life, an elixir of love, an elixir of eternal youth. Yes, what we all desire. Just ten drops in half a chalice of water after each repast, and the elixir’s powers are rendered most charitably. Whence did I obtain this precious life-giving liquid? Marry, I found it by the wash basin in the lavatory. Thou seest, ’tis an elixir bucal, or what the commoners will call mouthwash, and it appears to hail from Spain. Absolutely transfixed, I can scarcely bring myself to behold the vessel, let alone consider imbibing its exquisite contents. Alas, I shall blog to make the tarrying sweeter.
Hitherto, I was in the habit of cleansing my mouth with enjuague bucal. As previously noted, the vulgar term for this is mouthwash or mouth rinse, if thou wilt. This appellation lacks poesy and wants heart, but I enjoin thee to adopt it if thou wishest to be apprehended by thy fellow wayfarer. Shouldst thou perceive the need to make life more grandiose and esoteric, may I suggest the employment of elixir (or elíxir) in its stead.
Elixir does call to mind alchemists and King Arthur, but, ne’er fear, elixirs are alive and well in the XXI century. If thou hadst given nary a thought to mouthwash as a magic potion or philter, I entreat thee to reconsider the matter. The transformation of foul, fetid, stinking vapors into hale, sweet-smelling, kissable breath is nothing short of a modern-day medical miracle that recalls Jesus’ turning of water into wine. It is the alchemy of our times, the transubstantiation for the pagan masses, and its agent is no mere wash: forsooth, ’tis an elixir. I therefore doff my sombrero to the Spanish who show proper deference to its faculties. Hark, let us uphold the mystique, for far be it from us to pretend to understand the oral elixir’s purifying properties.
Elixir: a sweetened liquid usually containing alcohol that is used in medication either for its medicinal ingredients or as a flavoring; a clear, sweet-flavored liquid used for medicinal purposes, to be taken orally and intended to cure one’s ills
Elixir: from Medieval Latin, from Arabic al iksīr: the elixir, probably from Greek xērion: powder used for drying wounds
Nuestro amor que es un elixir de la vida, una cura contra las enfermedades; una fortaleza que permite afrontar todos los dilemas de la vida y de la existencia.
Our love, which is an elixir of life, a cure against all ailments; a stronghold that makes us able to face all the dilemmas of life and existence.
Henceforth, I will luxuriate in matutinal elixirs, I shall fain affix them to my lexicon, and I shall appreciate their other-worldly qualities as I swish them betwixt my cheeks each morning. Verily, all this prolix talk of elixirs puts me in the mood to read Don Quixote. Elixir procured, I now make haste to seek a noble steed and a knight.