How people find my blog

The world has questions, and Google tries its dangdest to answer them. Sometimes, though, I get the impression that some people leave my blog feeling empty-handed, none the wiser despite all the help I try to give. To make everyone’s life easier, I’ll try to answer some of the wayfarers’ questions and respond to their enigmatic statements in their search queries.

Oh, who am I trying to kid? I’m doing this because I found these searches either strange, funny, inane, poignant, or all of the above. I’ve been vocabatting for about five and a half months now, so pardon the length.

i trying to read these words but they are in spanish – Me, I try to read as much in Spanish as possible, but I take it this was a frustrating experience for you. That’s a toughie. Either take classes to learn Spanish, use a Spanish-English dictionary, or pay me to translate the text for you. Contact info in About link.

why does craig romney speak spanish – Why does anyone speak Spanish? I imagine that he fell in love with some aspect of the Latin American/Hispanic culture and wanted to be able to communicate with people. I can’t put it all down to just wanting to convert them to Mormonism. Why don’t you speak Spanish?

how does craig romney speak such a perfect spanish? – He probably studied for a long time, got a ton of practice when he lived in Chile, and now reads every new post on Vocabat to fill in the gaps of little things he’s forgotten and details he never noticed in the first place. I’ll have him do a guest post stat.

romneys son looks hispanic – Good for him. They’re beautiful people. Good for you for noticing.

is romney’s son spanish? – Why don’t you work on his family tree and elucidate his origins to all of us, you budding genealogist, you.

how to say “do you want some coffee” in french? – Wrong blog.

alvin and the chipmunks meet and greet – Is taking place on my private blog, not this one.

cowtalk recnt posted conversations about milk pricing – You didn’t save my blog in your bookmarks, did you? Sorry, cowboy.

mucho pelo love u¿Mucho pelo soy yo? ¿O eres tú? Bueno, como sea, mucho pelo love u 2.

what have you heard about colombia? – Not much that’s worth repeating. Please don’t get your information from movies or American news. Pick up a book, purchase a plane ticket, or make a Colombian friend.

is the phrase to talk your ear off offensive – Not necessarily. But, no one really wants to be described this way. I was once described by a close friend in college with this phrase and it did kind of sting. I’ve since become more considerate and regularly make huge efforts to be taciturn. Some of us were just cursed with the gift of gab.

translate the phrase “to give credit where credit is due” to french – Stop trying to making me feel bad about not speaking French!

how do you commonly used adjectives in spanish say not very talkitive in spanish – Ooh, a question within a question. You’re so deep.

i have to change my toco spanish – TMI! So much for a first impression.

mitt romney’s child speaks spanish but looks mexican – There’s no “Mexican” look. And even if there were, there’s absolutely no incongruity in appearing Mexican and being a Spanish speaker. In fact, there’s an incredibly high correlation between them, although there are also many indigenous languages spoken in Mexico. I don’t think that that’s where your confusion originated, though. I rather put it down to ignorance.

when to use the phrase “quite the charmer” – When you meet me.

what i would change in 2012,that i did in 2011 – Me, lots. Too personal to share on a language blog, though. You? I have no idea. Improve your Spanish, maybe?

me tear up a bit – me feel sad for you

how do you say “god grant you peace” in latin – I don’t know Latin, either. And I’m quite at peace about it, believe me.

mickey and minnie having sex tattoos – Seriously? This is the kind of art you would choose to adorn your body for the rest of your life? I hope you’ve already secured a committed partner.

what is a 3 word spanish greeting? – Too many to count! Hola, ¿qué más? ¿Bien o qué? ¿Cómo has estado? ¿Qué me cuentas? ¿Qué has hecho? Quiubo, ¿dónde andas? Is three a lucky number for you or what?

talk about a cow in spanish – I’m pretty sure I’m the only blogger in the universe strange enough to have specifically anticipated your exact need.

we colombians celebrate – Do you ever! I wish Americans celebrated more.

why is my spanish comprehension so bad – Sometimes I wonder the same thing. And then I stop being pathetic and decide to do something about it. The only way to get better at something is through practice. Listen to people, listen to TV shows, listen to podcasts, listen to music. Force yourself to listen to stuff you don’t understand and conversations you struggle to follow. Do not zone out! Focus. Interact and respond. This is one problem you’ll never solve by surfing online all by your lonesome.

garfield español yo?¿Será?

i want to say thank you and goodbye – You’re very welcome, and we’ll try to do our best to act like we miss you.

tweety shaped poems – If you ever give me one of these, I am breaking up with you on the spot. Same thing if any poem or love letter so much as mentions a cartoon character.

working my patas – Much better than estirándolas. Stay alive, bro!

please let me find the list vocabulary medical interpreters test – Well, aren’t you just a regular Southern belle! Do I not find what I need on Google because I haven’t been minding my p’s and q’s?

se come mucho arroz en colombia?Sí. Como ni te puedes imaginar, parce.

mitt romney speaks chinese – No, no. You’ve got it all wrong.

good eye watering jokes – Are you buying or selling? I’d love to have some. Jokes are so not my forte. The only joke I can ever remember involves a skeleton walking into a bar. It takes all of three seconds to tell, and is then forgotten in exactly the same period of time.

words that sound like consolador – Is this to use in a poem? Eww. (This isn’t the same poem that’s going to be Tweety-shaped, right? Right?)

colombians lie to gringos – Sometimes, sure.  Learn some Spanish, dude. Then you’ll realize that Colombians lie to Colombians, gringos lie to Colombians, Colombians lie to gringos, and gringos lie to gringos. It’s not personal. Most people are honest. I’m pretty sure there’s no mendacity gene on either side. Or maybe you’re just a sucker wherever you go.

for safety they took coger – I’m flummoxed. Has using coger been keeping me safe all this time? Is that what I owe my peaceful two years in Colombia to? I’m taking coger every morning for the rest of my life, then! None of that agarrar or tomar silliness for me– that stuff’s for pansies.

3 verb for lonely – This one made me sad. ¡Y me corchó! Well, I’ll choose achicopalarsellorar, and reflexionar. In that order, too. Get sad, cry, and then think about why you’re lonely. It happens to all of us.

hispanic people use twitter – Did it take a handsome government grant from my tax dollars for you to arrive at this erudite conclusion?

try to find the cat – No. Don’t cats eat bats? Or is it bats that eat cats? Didn’t you ever read Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland?

what parts of my job are most stessful forme as medical interpreter and why? – I have no idea.

vocabat means what in english – Not a thing. I suppose I’m giving it a meaning, though, coining a new word here. Vocabat, n. [ˈvoʊkʌbæt] A peculiar blog featuring way more than any sane person would want to know about all the odds and ends of Spanish, particularly Colombian Spanish. An open love letter to the Spanish language.

colombian boyfriend – Lucky you.

who gets maple syrup in bogota ? – Do you mean who carries it? Or which Rolos truly understand maple syrup and the depths of its scrumptiousness? Expect to be a little disappointed on both counts, just letting you know.

i am going to touch myself in spanish – Thanks for the heads-up. I’ll avert my virtual gaze.

easy way to learn greetings in spanish – Take a look at a list of common greetings, make Spanish-speaking friends, and greet your heart out.

how to say darling without being syropy – Just say it. I love the word “darling” (from a romantic partner) and would never call someone “syropy” for using it. Not that there’s anything wrong with syrup. But don’t waste it on me– the only way to my heart is through el español.


11 responses to “How people find my blog

  1. But I still have some questions about the French language.


  2. I’m jealous. How do you do it? I never get any funny search queries like this ending up on my site. Me too wanna goof off. Think I need to work on my SEO.


    • Thanks. This was but a very small sampling. I hope things get funnier and weirder with time.

      How do I do it? I don’t know, I just write frequently and use all kinds of colorful language. I guess I hit blogging “gold” with my posts about cartoon characters in Spanish and Mitt Romney’s son. Apparently everyone and their mother was and is still Googling these topics. I’m sure interesting searches are just a matter of time and words written. I almost never think about SEO, but, then again, this blog is (so far) not for profit :)


      • If you are looking for money, I hear being a french teacher is quite lucrative. The students seem to be looking for knowledge all over the place and need some guidance. Maybe something to look into to ;)


  3. “Stop trying to making me feel bad about not speaking French!”

    “When to use the phrase “quite the charmer” – When you meet me”.

    Lol x 2!



  4. I remember I found your blog, by you finding mine! Thanks for the help by the way.


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